From Meh to Memorable: Upgrade Your Dating Profile Photos
Last time I talked about the basics of getting started with online dating in this post. Today, let’s take a closer look at one of the most critical elements of your online dating success: profile photos.
Imagine walking into a bar, restaurant, party, or even a grocery store.
What catches your eye first?
Who stands out to you?
More importantly, who is the first attractive person you notice?
That’s the effect your profile photo should have: it needs to captivate, spark interest, and leave an impression.
Why Photos Matter
Dating apps require at least one photo to start swiping and getting matches. Apps like Hinge even require a minimum of four photos (or videos). Why? Because including more photos creates a well-rounded view of your personality and lifestyle. Thoughtfully selected photos that highlight your hobbies, social life, and individuality can attract matches who align with you — just don’t make them all selfies! Hinge's research offers insights into which types of photos perform best.
That said, quality always beats quantity. It’s better to have fewer, high-quality photos than a full lineup of mediocre (aka “meh”) ones. Aim for at least four solid photos that showcase who you are and what you enjoy.
Your first profile photo is your one chance to make a stellar first impression. Plus, dating apps often give new users a temporary visibility boost. If it’s underwhelming, you risk being passed over. Make it count by using eye-catching, well-composed photos that increase your chances of getting noticed and matched.
Tip for Hinge users: Their “Top Photo” feature lets the app test which of your 4–6 photos resonates most with potential matches.
Now that you know why photos are critical, let’s dive into the kinds of photos that can help you stand out.
Which Photos to Choose?
Treat your dating profile like a mini-documentary of your life. The best photos tell a story without words. Y'know, "a thousand words" kind of thing.
Here are some ideas for photo themes:
Action Shots: Showcase a hobby or activity you love — playing basketball, salsa dancing, playing board games.
Travel Photos: Whether it’s a local day trip or a vacation abroad, these images suggest you like to explore and try different things.
Smiling Close-Ups: Your face is the star here. Make sure the lighting is good and the background isn’t distracting.
Social Context: Include one photo with friends or family (but make sure it’s clear who you are in the group!!).
I put together a collage of examples to give you some inspiration. Notice the natural or warm light, variety of activities and poses, and relaxed, natural expressions.
Now that you know what kinds of photos work, let’s explore where you can find (or create) them.
Where to Source Great Photos
Finding great photos doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive. Here are some easy places to start:
Your Social Media and Camera Roll: Browse through your Instagram, Facebook, or phone gallery. Look for photos that capture natural moments, hobbies, or travel adventures with good lighting and clarity.
Your Friends’ Social Media: Ever notice your friends always post better pictures of you than you do? Check your friends’ accounts for group or event photos where you look natural and engaged. Just make sure it’s clear who you are in the picture—crop if necessary.
Videos Screenshots: Don’t overlook video footage! Screenshots from a video can capture candid, dynamic moments. Look for frames where you’re laughing, smiling, or mid-activity.
Ask a Friend: Enlist a friend with a good eye and a decent smartphone to help you out. Head to a park or your favorite café, and turn it into a fun hangout/photo shoot. You’ll feel more comfortable and get authentic shots.
Be a Tourist: If you’re out at a scenic spot or event, ask someone nearby to take a photo of you. Most people are happy to help.
Events or Gatherings: Have a work event, family gathering, or friend’s birthday coming up? These are great opportunities for more dressed-up, candid photos that feel natural and social.
Hire a Photographer: If you can budget for it, a professional shoot is an investment in your dating (and social media) future. Skip overly formal LinkedIn headshots or stiff, staged poses.
Local Photography Meetups or Events: Some communities host photo meetups where photographers and hobbyists take portraits for free or a small fee. This can be a budget-friendly way to get creative photos.
DIY with a Tripod: While selfies aren’t ideal, they can work if you use your smartphone’s self-timer and a tripod to create a polished look. Be sure to mix selfies with other types of photos to add variety and depth to your profile.
What to Do in Your Photos?
Here are some ideas to help:
Keep it Natural: Think of moments that make you smile. That’s the energy you want to capture.
Engage With Your Environment: Whether you’re holding a cup of coffee, reading a book, or walking your dog, props and activities make photos feel dynamic.
Dress the Part: Wear clothes that make you feel confident and reflect your style. Avoid anything too busy or distracting.
Look at the Camera: Direct eye contact in at least one photo creates a sense of connection.
Smile (or Don’t): A genuine smile is always a win, but if you’re not a smiler, a neutral or playful expression can work too.
Bonus Tips
Natural lighting: This is the most flattering type of lighting. Timing-wise, aim for photos at morning or "golden hour".
Variety: Avoid making all your photos the same. Variety is key to showing different aspects of your personality.
Backdrops: Choose uncluttered, interesting backdrops. A cityscape, a park, or even a colorful wall can make a huge difference.
Experiment: Approach this as an experiment. Try different photos and pay attention to how matches respond. For those using Hinge, try their “Top Photo” feature.
My Challenge to You
This week, take at least three new photos for your dating profile. The goal isn’t to swap them out immediately. Instead, focus on getting comfortable experimenting with different styles — action, candid, close-up — and finding ways to let your personality shine.
If you’re feeling brave, share your favorite one with a friend for feedback — or better yet, let me know how it goes!
Remember, your photos don’t need to be perfect. They should showcase the best version of you. Embrace your quirks and uniqueness — those are often what make you most memorable. Now, grab your camera (or phone), and let your profile tell your story.
